As I plucked my eyebrows this morning, I glanced at the red rose which I have romantically placed by the mirror in our bathroom. Along with a handmade card from…
Even this year my birthday came and went. Just like an unlit fart, it left no apparent sign. A slight lingering of age-related thoughts, perhaps the realisation that I am…
“In a mother’s womb were two babies. One asked the other: “Do you believe in life after delivery?”
Everything about potty training is a ‘for fuck’s sake’ swearing opportunity. Mother Nature truly messed this one up…. The tedious remembering to plonk her on the potty ever so often,…
When hideousness calls, you can always count on China to infallibly answer. Ten days to Christmas and there came the tack out, in all its kitsch grandeur, arousing my astonished…
With my full surprise, Fintan made the official decision to execute Fiona. “We have to” he said bravely. Fiona is not a neighbour nor a cousin. Along with Gypsy Valerie,…
This morning the day introduced itself with an extravagant thick mist that enveloped our cosy home in a cloud of expectation for the rain to come. It is meant to…
It happens quite often these days that I have nursery rhymes stuck in my head. Today it was Incy Wincy Spider’s turn (cousin of the American Itsy Bitsy Spider). I…
I read somewhere that they call it Terrible Twos because ‘Fucking Awful’ doesn’t start with T. A month ago I realised this is pretty accurate. My Camila days have been…
I was midway into cooking an improvised version of a ratatouille when I received a whatsapp message from an old friend announcing the sudden death of our ex-gym instructor and…